Eli: Mommy for your birthday, I am going to be nice to you all day.
Me: Well that is one nice gift.
Eli: I also promise not to ask about who is my "real" mother either.
Me: You have seen the pictures of me with YOU in my belly.
Eli: I won't talk about how your butt feels like a wet diaper.
Me: Let's just go with being nice to me all day.